New Year musings (because a 2023 review is now out of date. I think.)
I’ve been thinking about the importance of small decisions. My birthday is in January. The coincidental new year and new age have always drawn me to change. I find the line between one year and another to be helpful mentally. An imaginary line in the sand. Here’s my list of things neither here nor there but could be everywhere.
I don’t set goals. I’ll write down things that I want to see and do at the beginning of the year. I rarely look back until December. Did I do what I had hoped? Did I change what I wanted from start to end? Some years I write a lot of what I want. Some years only a few. I’m never disappointed by what doesn’t get checked off the list. I’m more proud of what I accomplish. Even small realities.
Desire to reality: Wants take time. I’m a naturally reflective person. I have been journaling for 18 years now. My discovery about life, when reading through past journals (past selves, past lives even), is how LONG it takes from problem to resolution. Often times, it takes YEARS.
In order to realize a blessing now, there has to be an acknowledgement that something is lacking. A poverty in ourselves, our circumstances, our relationships, or in our wider context. This is the first step in change. Awareness.
The only thing in life that can be controlled is myself. Personal responsibility is the only cause I care to tackle. My mind and my freedom of choice is THE most important tool I have. In a world ripe with quick answers to deep problems, belief follows action. My advice: Be careful what you believe about yourself. Be careful what thoughts you allow in your mind. We live in a world that seeks to control our attention. Know this. YOU have a right to your own mind. Claim it and do not believe anything that tells you otherwise.
Relationships are hard. But as my most favorite show reminds us: “PEOPLE ARE ALL WE’VE GOT!” I can’t believe the people in my life. They are good. They’re wonderful. They’re annoying. They’re mine. And I love them. There’s a story of a student who professes his love to his teacher. The teacher asks the student, Do you know what hurts me? To which the student replied, No. Then you do not love me, said the teacher. People think the opposite of love is hate but it’s actually indifference.
Learn to love. Learn to love as you would like to be loved. You’ll still be surprised and disappointed by people. But remember, not all surprise is bad and disappointment is another place to learn my own expectations. Being part of The Membership of community is a wonderful gift.
Before I get too existential, I finally watched The Godfather. It is perfection.
I’m going back to old movies because I need new perspective. Looking back to move forward is fun. We’ve been trained to a certain way of storytelling. It’s so part of our collective conscience, we don’t know that’s not how it’s always been. I really appreciate the way old movies don’t give everything away. It feels more like real life. Music has changed how we watch movies. And that’s all fine and good, but in life, we don’t get the menacing music right before the crash.
Throw themed parties. Everyone will hate you and then love you.
Throw joint birthday parties. You can thank me later.
Process and outcome are not the same thing. Learn to trust the process and have the outcome follow.
Success is a dirty word we don’t talk about. I read an interview about a writer. She was asked about her father’s work and how it influenced her career. She said, He loved his work so much, he was never bothered by the idea of success.
I’m not so concerned with what I do so much as how it improves or disrupts living. I used to think what I did was my identity. Now, I’m just happy to do something I don’t hate and gives me time for other enjoyments.
Last year, I made the decision not to drink for a whole year. I lasted until September. It was the best decision. It improved my sleep, my waistline, my mind, and my bank account. However, participating is just as important as abstaining for me.
My only goal in life is to learn balance in all things. Nothing is either/or. It’s both/and.
I’m suspicious of too much busyness. I’d rather be called lazy than be too busy.
My upstairs renovation is going wonderfully and I can’t wait to show it.
I love making design choices that make it harder than it needs to be. But I’ve never regretted the final product.
If you decide to do cement tile, just talk to me first.
I’m not even done with my house and I can’t wait to start another design project. Am I a smart idiot or a dumb genius? I don’t know.
As always, A house has a number, a home has a name.